lovable losers and another season of mediocrity

Marlins center piece, Hanley Ramirez

By BEA
    Another baseball season has reached the so-called “Dog Days of Summer,” and your Florida Marlins are once again stuck in the middle. Los Marlins pulled to a game over .500 by annihilating the Washington National by outscoring them 21-8 and by virtue sweeping their 3 game set. However, The Marlins, as they have throughout their franchise history, with the exception being their 1997 and 2003 World Series Championships, lost their momentum in Cincinnati and were swept in three straight games while failing on 27 attempts to get a runner in scoring position home. To be a Florida Marlin fan is akin to chasing your dream girl or guy, as you believe you are inching closer to sealing the deal, and that the prospect of landing this person is promising, she/he drops the bombshell and laughs in your face telling you that you had no shot in the first place. Likewise, Jeffrey Loria, the notoriously frugal owner of the Marlins promises the South Florida fan base that their favorite baseball team will indeed make the playoffs in 2010. He tells you that the team has all of the components of a winner, and thus, the prospects of making the playoffs are promising. You, the fan, revel in these statements and truly believe that the Marlins, who have won two World Series in a span of 13 years, and who finished with a surprising 87 wins in 2009, had all of the tools in place to make the 2010 playoffs. But, remember, the Marlins have the fourth lowest payroll in baseball and an owner who claims he is losing revenue on a yearly basis. However, back to reality Marlins Fans, these guys, Owner Jeffrey Loria, Team President David Samson and General Manager Larry Beinfest, and Michael Hill (The Brain-trust, if you will), led you on, and barring a near-perfect stretch to conclude the 2010 Major League Baseball season, the Florida Marlins will once again be stuck in mediocrity, most likely finishing in third place in the National League East, as they did in 2009.

THE OFFSEASON: 2010
    Jeffrey Loria promised Florida Marlin Fans that 2010 was their year. He stressed that the pieces of the puzzle were there; that all the Marlins needed to do was play as they did in 2009, and that would be enough to make the playoffs. Loria, channeling his inner Nostradamus, predicted that his team would be playing in late October. These illusions/dreams of grandeur are wonderful and all, but that is what they are: illusions, dreams, and downright lunacy! Although the Marlins payroll to Win % is the best in baseball, if doesn’t mean much when next to no money is spent and the team overachieves, if the guy calling the shots is making empty playoff declarations.

Let’s recap Larry Beinfest’s offseason moves:

J.J. posted a 15-5 record with a 3.23 ERA in 2009

THE GOOD: Ace Josh Johnson, the anchor of the pitching rotation, a future Cy Young Award Winner, had an incredible 2009 season. Johnson posted a 15-5 record, with a 3.23 ERA, which is amazing in itself due to the 13 no-decisions he faced because of the hitter-friendly Marlin Bullpen. During the offseason, fans all over South Florida were screaming contract extension for JJ. While the 100 or so fans who fill up Landshark/Joe Robbie/Dolphins Stadium/Sun Life on a nightly basis were crying for JJ to be signed, MLB was breathing down Loria’s neck demanding that he spend money. In the midst of MLB taking a cattle prod to the Marlin’s coffers, Loria signed JJ to a 4 yr. deal worth about $39 million. This deal will go down as the bargain of the century, as Barry Zito, who is a decent pitcher, signed a seven year $126 million deal and has an 8-6 2010 record with a mid 3.00 ERA, while JJ is 10-5 with a 2.27 ERA and would be about 20-5 if the bullpen knew how to pitch! All summer we heard that Dan “Cigarette Toting, Power Hitting” Uggla was going to be traded, as the Fish wanted to move Chris Coghlan to 2nd base. However, the Marlins stood pat, and Uggla has rewarded their patience with a superb 2010 season thus far. Finally, a diamond in the rough a la Ross Gload was found in Donnie Murphy. Murphy, a career backup, most notably with the Oakland Athletics, has become utility man extraordinaire. Murphy has produced 4 walk off wins this season, and has played very well in his limited playing time.

Nick Johnson signed with the Yanks in the offseason

THE BAD: Traded Matt Lindstrom for BONO, well not the U2’s lead singer, although he would have helped to fill up the seats in Sun Life Stadium. But back to the trade,  Matt was traded for Bono’s not so famous third cousin  Robert Bono, well he probably isn’t related to the U2 front man and a guy named Jorge Jimenez; great trade as they were both released before the season started. Ross Gload, the major league leading pinch hitter (21) in 2009 was allowed to defect and signed with their division rivals, the hated Philadelphia Phillies. And all the Marlins did was anoint Emilio “light hitting” Bonafacio as his heir apparent. For Beinfest’s next act, he allowed two valuable relievers, Kiko Calero and Brendan Donnelley to sign with other National League Squads. Jeremy Hermedia was traded to the Red Sox for a pair of socks, although that loss did not hurt as fans despised their former 1st round pick. Nick Johnson was allowed to sign with the Yankees, even though he taught Marlins players patience at the plate.  Beinfest, Samson, and company, as they do every offseason, made a trip to the Scrapheap Junkyard to find some relief help. Here, the dynamic duo and friends found some bargain bin models (pitchers). They found a 1995 Mazda Millennia in Jose Veras, who wore out his welcome as a setup man to Mariano Rivera in New York. All Veras has done this season is post an ERA over 4.00 and was sent down to Triple-A to work on his “amazing” mechanics. Next, they found a few beat up 1991 Nissan Sentras, in Seth McClung, Mike McDougal, Derrick Turnbow, and Scott Strickland. The former three were released before the 2010 season started and Strickland has appeared in a game. As you can see, the offseason was not one to write home about. Addition by subtraction could have worked for a superior team like the Phillies, however, the Marlins, who had glaring holes in the bullpen and were in need of a #5 pitcher, failed to make a splash and stuck with their M.O., DO NOT SPEND AT ALL COSTS!

Dan Uggla has 27 HRs and 73 RBIs in 2009

THE MEDIOCRE-WHAT HAS GONE RIGHT: The Marlins could not find a trade to their liking, so they kept their cigarette toting, power hitting second baseman Dan Uggla, around for another season. Uggla  has produced 27 Home runs thus far this season and all he has done is become the Marlins MVP. Uggla has carried this offense on his back all season long, as he has produced a team leading 73 RBI’s. It seems as if his newly ordained 4th spot in the batting order has truly allowed him to elevate his game to the next level. The Marlin season started off slow, and this spelled doomsday for Manager Freddi Gonzalez. In a game v. the Arizona Diamondbacks, Hanley Ramirez, the Superstar Shortstop of your Marlins, failed to hustle for a ball that rolled into left field. Hanley was taken out of the game and was told that he would be suspended until he apologized to the team. Ramirez eventually did apologize; however, he threw his manager under the bus, stating that Freddie wouldn’t know about playing the game because he never reached the major league level. Freddie, applauded for his stance was fired a couple of weeks later due to the Marlins failure to crack above the .500 level. Many believed that mudslinger Bobby Valentine would become the next in line to manage the fish, however, the Marlins chose to bring up Triple-A manager Edwin Rodriguez and his bench and hitting coaches from the minors. This move was thought to inject life into the wobbling baseball team. In the midst of Hanley’s impersonation of a more famous Ramirez, Manny, Gabby Sanchez quietly plugged away and had an amazing first half and thus far a solid second half of this 2010 season. Gabby is in the top ten for most categories across the board for Rookies, and has led the team is Batting Average for most of the season. Gabby, who had to compete with fellow rookie Logan Morrison for the 1st Base job during the offseason, has wowed executives across baseball. His presence at the plate has been remarkable for a rookie evidenced by his .290 average and his defense at First Base is likewise solid. Chris Coghlan slumped badly for the first part of the season, but he found his rookie of the year (2009) form until a celebration would end his season. Not known for being very nimble on his feet, Coghlan attempted to pie Donnie Murphy after one of his many walk off wins. Channeling his inner Moe, Larry and Curly, he tore his meniscus after falling flat on his attempt to pie Murphy in the face. Cue up Logan Morrison, who has filled in admirably in Left Field, and is a promising player for this Marlin team. The biggest story was Josh Johnson’s first half, leading the league in ERA. JJ would lead the league in wins, if it were not for Leo, Jose, Clay, Taylor and the other no-named Scrap Heap Bullpen. He has had over 12 game blown by the bullpen. Ricky Nolasco, who has 13 wins and Anibel Sanchez pitching with a mid 3.00 ERA have been solid holding down the #2 and #3 Starting Pitchers roles respectively. However, Chris Volstad has been very inconsistent and quite the disappointment. Chris has hovered around the major league level for the last three years, and it seems as if his “stuff” has deteriorated over the years. He went from a 2008 6 win 4 loss season with a 2.74 ERA to a 9-13 2009 to a 6 win 8 loss 2010 campaign with an ERA of almost 5! There is no need to address the #5 pitcher, because this revolving door will continue until the Marlins spend some money!

THE MVP of this team so far has been Dan Uggla.

The Rookie of the Year should be Mike Stanton (pictured below)

Stanton pictured above, well, his clone,
Herman Munster (Imploring Loria to spend money!)

The most important contribution has come from the Paul Bunyan wielding, power hitting, Giancarlo “Mike Stanton” Cruz. Stanton has been on a major tear lately at Right Field, as he is batting .270, and already has 14 HR and 39 RBIs in only 54 games. He has combined to belt 34 HR’s between the minor and major league level. This guy is a stud, and shall become a force to reckon with over the years, as he has done all of this at the tender age of 20! Michael has been compared to a young Dave Winfield, and Winfield himself was in awe of Stanton after watching him take batting practice in San Diego.
The much maligned bullpen does boast one diamond in the rough, by the name of Clay Hensley. Hensley was signed for the price of a hot dog, and he has responded by solidifying the setup role, with an ERA in the 2.00’s; however the same cannot be said for any other member of that nuclear imploding ‘pen. Another bright spot in the first half was Ronny Paulino who filled in on a permanent basis when John Baker went down with an injury. Paulino showed the Marlins’ brass that he could be an everyday player and not just a situational catcher who batted vs. lefties. However, Paulino has faded down the stretch and has seen his batting average dip from about .290 to .264.

THE MEDIOCRE: THE REASON FOR THE MARLINS .500 RECORD AND WHY A 

PLAYOFF RUN IS OUT OF THE QUESTION FOR 2010: 

Renyel, as thin as he is good

THE BULLPEN: The Florida Marlins are by no means world beaters. Outside of the aforementioned Loria, everyone else had them finishing in third in the NL East behind Atlanta and Philadelphia. However, had the Marlins retooled the bullpen, and had clutch hitting off the bench been addressed, this season would have been different from the last few. But, as always, no spending equals no result.  Let’s first run down the bullpen, or lack thereof. The former Yankee great (can you sense the sarcasm?), Jose Veras,  was so bad in the earlier parts of the season, that he was optioned down to Triple-A. Veras has calmed down over the past few weeks, however, he has largely been a disappointment sporting a 4.00+ ERA.  Dan Meyer, who was solid last year, has imploded and has been stuck in Triple-A for most of the season. Meyer models an ERA of close to 10.00! It has gotten so bad, that Taylor Tankersley, sporting a handlebar mustache (below), was brought up from Triple-A as the left-handed savior. Pundits raved about Tankersley ability to strike out lefties. All Mr. Handlebar has done is posted a 6.75 ERA, giving up 10 runs in his 12 innings of work. Once Freddie was fired, Edwin Rodriguez had no choice but to put Tankersley in the ballgame vs. lefties. The man known as the Hopper, Burke Bandenhop, got off to an atrocious 2010 campaign. The Hopper has an ERA of 4.15, and gave up a grand slam v. the Braves, by Brooks Conrad in July. Hopper posted a 10.38 ERA in May/April and was likewise optioned down to Triple-A. Next up is the lovable Renyel Pinto. Pinto is to the Marlins fans as Lebron is to Charles Barkley, fodder, and hated. Barkley hates Lebron because he is younger, a much better basketball player than Sir Charles was and made his decision to chase a title before he became flabby. Now, Marlins fans hate Pinto because he is flabby, young, and a waste of space. Well, Marlins fans rejoiced when the walk-king, Pinto, was released by the Marlins after giving up another home run, and has been spotted as an usher on Broadway, walking ticket holders to their seats. Leo Nunez, the prodigal son, is not as advertised. Leo had a solid 2009 season, however, his 2010 season has been mired by inconsistency. Leo has blown a league leading 7 saves, most of those being Josh Johnson starts. Leo has thrown his breaking pitches far too much and his ERA at one point was closing on mid 3’s. The lack of bullpen depth at the front and the back of the bullpen has severely hampered the Marlins chances at closing and winning ballgames.  The Marlins made one off the radar trade by acquiring Will Ohman from the Baltimore Orioles for Rick Vanden Hurk. The Fish have a penchant for trading for lefty specialists, as they have traded for Nick Johnson (albeit a hitter) and Arthur Rhodes, over the last two to three years. This trade would have benefited the Marlins if it has been conducted over the off-season, however, Ohman’s impact will be marginal due to where the Marlins currently sit in the division (10.5 games back of the Braves).

Cody Ross hit 24 HRs and 90 RBIs in 2009

PLATE PRODUCTION: The second sore spot has been the production with runners in scoring position. Although Dan Uggla has clearly been the MVP of this team offensively, clutch hits have been few and far between all season. Take for instance, this past weekend’s series versus the Reds. The Fish were an abysmal 0-27 with runners in scoring position. Yes, you read that correctly, they stranded 27 runners who were on second or third base in three days. Cody Ross’s  power production has dropped off dramatically from last season, as he only has 10 HR’s this season, compared to last year’s 24.

Past Trades: Larry Beinfest, David Samson, and Michael Hill, the brain trust of the Florida Marlins, have been given far too much leeway and not enough criticism for the trades they have made over the past few seasons. The worst of the trading, was sending All-Star, and probably the best hitter not named Pujos, Miguel Cabrera, to the Tigers for Cameron “Missing in Action” Maybin, Mike “Out of baseball” Rabelo, The aforementioned Burke Badenhop, and Andrew “erratic, Minor Laager” Miller. This trade will go down as the worst in franchise history, as the Marlins have reaped zero benefits by trading arguably the best player in team history. Next, we move on to the curious case of Emilio Bonafacio. The brain trust traded Josh Willingham, who has thrived playing for the Nationals and promising lefty Scott Olsen to the Nationals for the aforementioned Bonafacio. With the exception of the start of the 2009 season in which Emilio tore the Nationals apart, Bonafacio has been a bust, who cannot hit, cannot bunt, and has been exclusively used as a pinch runner and utility player. Willingham has been a solid veteran and is batting about .270 with 16 HR. Thus, another terrible trade by the Marlins front office. However, to be fair, this group did trade for an unknown Hanley Ramirez, but they gave up their best pitcher in Red Sox ace Josh Beckett.

The clueless lefty Taylor Tankersley

    So there you have it, a lack of pitching, timely hitting and defense has clearly derailed the Marlins 2010 title quest. Realistically, the Marlins had no shot at the World Series with this bunch of lovable losers. With the exception of Josh Johnson, Dan Uggla, and Gabby Sanchez, the rest of the bunch have been wildly inconsistent at one point of the season or another. Heading into the last 2 months of the season, the front office needs to start thinking about a #5 starting pitcher and a facelift to the bullpen. Until the league’s second lowest payroll starts to increase (predicted to be 2012 in time for the unveiling of the new stadium), the Marlins will be stuck in the middle, and stuck in mediocrity.